It's like Shit. I am not sure of any better words to use to describe this feeling..... the feeling of not being able to sleep when I am free to, and not having the freedom to sleep when I am feeling to. Yawn.
The former as well-known is insomnia and the latter I would coin the term as anti-insomnia. These dizygotic 'twins' are, I think, misplaced along the time-line of my daily routine. How on earth can I align them properly? The more I force myself to sleep at night, I more late it would get for me fall asleep; and the more I force myself not to sleep at work, the more drowsy I feel all day.
It didn't take much thought to figure out the reason behind my sleeping disorder. The reason was a kind-of addiction. Addicted to Think. Now, Think-ing most of the times isn't as productive as it sounds. There must be some way to shut down this futile areas of Think-ing. So I began to Read fiction. Completing the easiest book (Chetan Bhagat) in a couple of nights, shifted my sleep by a few hours early.
Moving to the next book, probably an Erich Segal one, I feel a subtle confidence that I can handle the villainous 'twins' with heroic aplomb.
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so have you moved from dreemz to thougtz?
ReplyDeleteI am surprised that a novel allows you to sleep .... a good novel is the one that disenages you from world...every thing including food, sleep... till the author decides to let you off.
may be that sets the bar for you as a writer
yes buddy!!! books, the subtle romance ones, keep me glued to the story and restrict my mind from wandering. And once my mind stops wandering, I get sleep. :)
ReplyDeleteSounds very familar. May be, because I face the same everyday. :) Though, its useful for a creative person. Reading a book (if its an interesting book) at night can stimulate your brain which will in turn increase the insomnia. Listening to Music also works the same way.
ReplyDeleteIf you want to know the cure, best is 'physical activity' i.e 'excercise' during daytime... the racing mind tends to tire out and sleep at the right time.
This addiction to think...is due to the fact that, as an aspiring filmmaker, or a story teller...you are always in search of memories or you are always processing them...So I believe it is inevitable....Got to live with it....Simple, when was the last time you really....realy enjoyed 'watching' a movie like you did when you were a kid....like when you watched 'jagadeka Veerudu Atilkoa Sundari'...
ReplyDeleteHi Santhosh,
ReplyDeleteStrangely, I somehow have retained this childishness while watching movies. I am still scared to watch horror and touched by drama. Yesterday I was watching an Iranian-Iraqi film named 'Turtles can fly'. At a certain point in the story, when the girl is about to abandon her little son, I for once paused the film because I was too involved with the emotion there that I needed some time to accept what the girl was doing and why she is doing so. I continued watching the film after 15 minutes. (Do watch the film for the kind of drama created without exaggeration).
Anyway, I do understand your take when you mention about the kiddish way of watching movies. It's about not thinking while watching a movie.
And yah.... I do agree that... I need to accept that I can't stop thinking. :)
Cheers,
Purnesh